


Like Champagne and Galaxies

by Sherlohn



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Angst, Declarations Of Love, Gen, Johnlock - Freeform, Reichenbach Angst, Reichenbach Feels, Romance, Sad John, The Reichenbach Fall
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-16
Updated: 2013-08-16
Packaged: 2017-12-23 17:30:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/929190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sherlohn/pseuds/Sherlohn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John's unspoken thoughts during his final moments with Sherlock.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like Champagne and Galaxies

“The stuff that you wanted to say but didn’t say it…”

“Yeah.”

“Say it now.”

 

_“Why are you saying this?"_

_“I’m a fake.”_

_“Sherlock –”_

 

Think, Sherlock, I want you to think. Look at me and think. Is that not what you do best anyway? Everything you need is here, printed in my eyes and the set of my mouth, in the lines of my posture and the shaking of my body. Deduce me and tell me what you think.

Do you see it yet? Is the butchering of my heart not obvious to that carefully refined mind of yours?

Stop telling me that you are a charade and that you lied to me. Those things don’t need saying. They are weak and meaningless, dying on your lips as you speak them because they hold no truth, just uselessness. _He_ is making you say this. I know it as surely as I know you and me. But he is not important, Sherlock. _We_ are important, this is important. I thought _I_ was important. So why do you act like I am not? As if you cannot see the mutilation inside of me?

Look at me, Sherlock. Look at me.

My life is so inexplicably tangled with yours that we must be intertwined to the last, to the bitter end that we are headed. That is the curse of such dependence upon another person, this feeling of rocketing pain ready to slam you to the ground. Is it reciprocated in your cool and level head? You feel the same, I’m sure you feel the same. You must feel the same. Did it not occur to you what this… _this_ would do to me? If you… then I… Oh god.

I can’t stop my hands from shaking, my breath from hitching.

Help me, Sherlock.

The crescendo of my thoughts are crashing waves through my mind and breaking into simply one, that one underlining thought that would always herald the most importance to me. Surely you can see it, the way my heart stutters and my mind dances around you must give it away. I have tried to conceal it before, Sherlock, but now I need you to see the channels of my heart.

So pull me apart, Sherlock, and study my core.

Do you see it now?

Do you see how you sparkle, like champagne and galaxies?

I love you, Sherlock Holmes, my impossibility, my rainbow against the night.

So please just stop it, stop this.

Please.

_Please._

_“Goodbye, John.”_

_“No, don’t –”_

 

“I’m sorry, I can’t.”  


End file.
